Understanding Domestic Violence: Why It Happens and How to Get Help

Domestic violence is a serious problem that affects many people and families. It often leaves victims feeling stuck and alone. This kind of abuse happens for different reasons, like one person wanting control, dealing with personal issues, pressures from society, or substance abuse. It's important to understand why it happens so we can address the problem and help those affected. If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence in Lubbock, Texas, there is help available. Call the Lubbock Women’s Shelter at (806) 741-2234. They offer support, resources, and a safe place. You are not alone, and there are people who care and want to help. You are stronger than you think, and a better future is possible. Don’t be afraid to take the first step—it’s the start of healing and safety.

A Message of Hope for Domestic Violence Survivors

If you are going through domestic violence, please know this: you are not alone, and none of this is your fault. Abuse—whether it’s physical, emotional, financial, or psychological—is never okay. There is help, there is hope, and you can have a better future.

Leaving can feel overwhelming. The fear, uncertainty, and emotional pain may make it seem impossible. But you are stronger than you think, and you can take back your life. Both Tiffany and I have survived domestic violence. It wasn’t easy, and it won’t be easy for you either, but it’s possible. If we—and so many others—could break free, you can too.

Sometimes, it’s hard to even recognize that you’re in an abusive relationship. Maybe you’re saying, “I’m staying for the kids,” or hoping, “They’ll change.” The hard truth is that they rarely do. You can’t change them, but you can choose to change your life. Choose safety. Choose to survive. Choose to thrive.

Getting help is a crucial step in breaking free. There are shelters, hotlines, and organizations ready to support you. They offer safe places and the tools you need to rebuild your life. Surround yourself with people who care about you, whether it’s family, friends, or support groups. Asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness—it’s a sign of strength. You deserve to live a life filled with peace, love, and respect.

Recognizing the Signs of Abuse

Abuse isn’t always physical. It can show up in different ways, like:

• Emotional abuse: Constant criticism, manipulation, gaslighting, or threats.
• Financial control: Keeping you from accessing money or a job to make you dependent.
• Isolation: Cutting you off from friends and family so you feel alone and trapped.
• Physical harm: Any hitting, choking, or other physical aggression.
• Sexual coercion: Forcing or pressuring you into sexual acts against your will.
• If any of these sound familiar, remember: this isn’t love. It’s abuse. And you deserve to feel safe, respected, and loved.

The Impact on Mental Health

Domestic violence doesn’t just leave physical scars—it takes a heavy toll on your mental health, too. Many survivors deal with anxiety, depression, PTSD, and feelings of worthlessness. Living in fear and being manipulated can drain your confidence and make it hard to ask for help. Knowing how abuse affects your mental health is an important step toward getting the care and support you need to heal.

Spotting Early Warning Signs

Abuse often starts in small, hard-to-notice ways. Early warning signs might include jealousy, controlling behavior, keeping you away from your loved ones, or constant criticism that lowers your self-esteem. Over time, these behaviors can get worse, making it harder to leave. Trust your gut—if something doesn’t feel right, it probably isn’t. Seeing these signs early can help you act before it gets worse. Remember, you deserve respect and equality in your relationships.